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Mike Tasos: The cold is really putting a damper on things
Mike Tasos
Mike Tasos

With profuse “mea culpas” for the bar, I was having gargantuan problems writing this past midweek. What with my teeth chattering and dismay at disrupted business travel plans, those two inches of snow wreaked untold devastation on all of us.

And who was the TV weather nitwit who told the kids not to go outside because it was too cold. If I have to suffer a brain freeze at the keyboard, then a few pre-hypothermia activities shouldn’t have had many lasting effects.

I can bet Ken Burns, long retired from Channel 5, would have taken off his coat, rolled up his sleeves and told us it was cold while standing outside on the station’s frozen weather deck. 

I guess no one is seeing the “Nanook of the North” movie at school. Let them see Nanook’s brood living on ice while dining on whale blubber. Sorry kiddies: There was no Publix and Nanook didn’t stave off Polar Bear attacks to put up lunchmeat, bread and milk.

And what’s wrong with teaching our kids more about sharing? Let’s start with holidays. 

We had one named after one person last Monday, the only national holiday where one guy has top billing. It honors an individual who made a huge difference, but he’s had a pretty solid supporting cast through the years.

I’m not saying we scrap the Martin Luther King holiday, so put down the phone. No, I’m saying we keep the holiday and rename it Civil Rights Day. 

Dr. King made a difference. But so did Jackie Robinson, Rosa Parks, Medgar Evers and so many others. Why can’t we honor the group with a holiday? Just like we’ll do next month with Presidents’ Day.  

Washington and Lincoln once had top billing with their own days. Now the whole lot of former presidents gets honored with one day. And no matter your opinions of all past presidents, they served and should be feted. 

Even the last one (sorry, I couldn’t help myself).

While I’m apologizing, the frigid weather had some bad effects on normally good people. Personally, I can blame wind chills of below zero on the terrible backsliding I did.

We all know that football season ended on Jan. 8 at Mercedes Benz Stadium. The Bulldogs and the Crimson Tide put on a fabulous show, one for the ages. And pay no heed to bad toupee-wearing sportscasters saying that no one except fans in the South cared about the game.

They should boost another gratis press box sandwich and check the ratings. The all-SEC winner-take-all game captivated fans everywhere. Well, maybe the Ohio State folks decided to watch hockey, but everyone else loved it.

After not watching the NFL all year, I couldn’t quit football cold turkey, so curiosity won out. I watched the Falcons beat the Rams in the playoffs. Then I watched the yawner in Philadelphia, coupled with the Vikings-Saints thriller. 

I realized I didn’t miss the NFL and am really praying we wake up tomorrow morning with a Jacksonville-Minnesota Super Bowl looming. That would serve Roger Goodell and his avaricious group right. Now there’s an all-Pro ratings disaster.

And with the game being played in Minneapolis, no matter the matchup, it’s going to be cold. No big deal. They’re used to it. In Minnesota, frostbite is like a chigger bite down here. The over-under for most Minnesotans every January is three fingers and toes.

We should be back to normal this week. The high temperature today is supposed to hover around 60. I’m cool with that. Except I need some help from teachers as they mold all those minds of mush into reasonably thinking adults.

Where were all the global warming folks last week when the wind chill was -5? I was in Knoxville and had to skedaddle back to Cumming so I didn’t get snowed in. I went looking for Al Gore, a big proponent of the theory that the planet’s end is imminent.

I’m sure he was shivering somewhere in the Smokies. 

Why don’t we have a global-warming summit in Cumming? Let’s go to Hacienda, have a taco-enchilada combo and discuss greenhouse gases.


Mike Tasos’ column is published every other Sunday. He wonders what in the world we did before heating systems, imagining the fire departments were a lot busier and if there were whisky-fueled bonfire/sing-a-longs in the living room. Comments can be sent to miketasos@earthlink.net. He is also on Facebook.