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Ashways Annual Ode to College Football
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Forsyth County News
Beat the drum and bang a gong!
Add fans-ninety thousand strong!
Ah, nothing beats the atmosphere
Of college football’s time of year!

Georgia Tech ruled the ACC.
Nothing beats sweet victory!
Yet, for all the Jackets might
They still felt the Bulldogs’ bite.

Tech’s defense will surely Groh.
He can coach ‘em up, you know.
Once the Jackets grasp his scheme
Tech will field a mighty team.

Tech’s offense baffles one and all;
No one knows who has the ball.
With Josh Nesbitt at the helm
Defenses they shall overwhelm.

Dogs have something new to say:
“Make it better. Everyday.”
Bulldog Nation bows to pray
For a fall with less dismay.

Some prayers answered: Willie’s axed.
Now the Dogs’ D won’t get waxed.
In Grantham’s scheme Dogs won’t sit back.
At last: the defense will attack!

The Dogs offense returns intact.
A talented group; that’s a fact.
Except the guy who runs the show;
He hasn’t played a down, you know.

Last year’s champs start Number One.
St. Nick’s Bama’s favorite son.
Sure, the Tide has gaps to fill,
But Ingram still runs downhill.

Gators never fall from grace.
More new talent finds a place.
Their big game: October two, suh:
Gators invade Tuscaloosa.

On the bayou, things aren’t fine.
Last two years: seventeen and nine.
And helping Les come undone
The Tigers’ ex is number one.

Auburn was a big surprise.
Chizik led the Tigers rise.
Malzahn’s offense? It’s a gas.
But can the brand-new QB pass?

Clown Kiffin’s gone! So unruly.
Cleaning house: Derek Dooley.
From Knoxville, he’ll lift the cloud;
Surely make his mama proud.

The Head Ball Coach sends signals mixed.
Gamecock problems still not fixed.
Each year starts with shows of pride.
By November, ‘Cocks are fried.

Seminoles have a new chief:
Jimbo Fisher rules their fief.
To survive in his new gig
Jimbo better win. And big.

Now, is Miami coming back?
Consistency the ‘Canes still lack.
The schedule shows they have no fear:
Ohio State and Pitt this year.

At last! Duke is on the mend.
Coach Cut starts a winning trend.
Dookies now won’t spend the fall
Just awaiting basketball.

The Terps’ Ralph Friedgen brings much girth.
Lately, though, a dearth of mirth.
Likewise, the Deacs of coach Jim Grobe
Whose defense foes just love to probe.
In the Big East, Pitt looks like itt;
Dion Lewis can run a bit.
But as a group, the conference goal:
No blow-out in a major bowl.

Ohio State looms once again
Coming off a rare bowl win.
Buck bowl wins only come, you see
When they avoid the SEC.

Charlie Weis, and his belly
Sacked. Enter Brian Kelly.
Those Irish eyes? Smiling soon
As Kelly ends ND’s swoon.

For Texas fans, it’s muted joy.
The Longhorns play sans Colt McCoy.
But shed no tears for coach Mack Brown.
The ‘Horns should cop the Big XII crown.

Boomer Sooner, what’s this jive?
Oklahoma, eight-and-five?
Coach Stoops’ seat now filled with thorns
No longer do they beat the ‘Horns.
Finally! Boise gets its due.
Likewise, the Frogs of TCU.
It took a while, though; that’s a shame.
Lack of a playoff is to blame.

The Pac-10 fields myriad yuks,
All in chase of Oregon’s Ducks.
They’ll all be mere cannon fodder
If Ducks shun the police blotter.

The Trojans greet their new dawn
With Lane Kiffin. Who’ll he con?
USC’s probation’s on;
Storied program, dead and gone.

So now it’s time to raise a cheer;
College football’s finally here!
Once the games have all been won,
May your team be Number One!